The Amusement of Childhood: It’s Some Ride, Especially for Adults!

“You want me to hold your hand so that you’re not scared, Mommy?” my six year old asked as we were high in the sky with the guitar ride swinging us around. I quickly said, “Yes!” and reached out for her little hand, closing my eyes waiting for the ride to come to an end.

Yesterday, we went to Trimpers Amusement Park in Ocean City, Maryland and to Jolly Rogers today, and my little girl was eager to get in every ride, especially the ones she wasn’t tall enough for last year. From roller coasters, to the swings, to the tea cups, to a ride called the “Freak Out,” Quinn had no fear and was oftentimes one of the youngest kids in the ride. I’m not sure if I was as brave as her at six years old, but I certainly am not as an adult when it comes to getting on many of those rides.

Thank goodness her dad was willing to be her ride buddy allowing me to get on the easy ones like the carousel and Ferris wheel. In an effort to show her that I can be brave, I got on the “Rock Star” and got to practice some piercing screams! I thought it was so sweet and empathetic of her to suggest holding my hand so that I wouldn’t be scared.

It made me think, maybe childhood isn’t as scary as we adults might think after all. Perhaps it’s us adults who sometimes focus on the scary, fast rides of life that come with adulthood thereby projecting it onto our children in hopes of protecting them because of our own life experiences and lost ability to be fearless. Interestingly, there are times when I am absolutely amused by how my daughter sparks something in me to be fearless and feel like a child again by simply going along for the ride as a passenger observing her enjoy and live out her childhood.

All the best,

Tanya

A Happy Father’s Day: Grateful I Picked a Loving Dad for My Daughter

 

Ever heard the phrase, “You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family?” If you think about it, this is only partially true. While I didn’t get to pick my own parents, I did get to pick who I would start a family with. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the best relationship with my father and was often emotionally and verbally abused by him (when my mother was not present) as a child causing me to lack self-esteem and often feel depressed. I was elated when my parents divorced because I was no longer subjected to my father’s ill treatment and vowed that I would try my best to protect my future child from suffering the same fate at the hands of her own father.

Gratefully, I was lucky enough to find a dear friend and significant other of nearly twenty years, and we’ve been married going on eight years. Sometimes, we fall in love with people but don’t take the time to envision how they will be as parents or they unpleasantly surprise us once we’re married revealing a person we didn’t realize was there. With this in mind, I feel so blessed that how I envisioned my husband as a parent based on his beliefs and values actually surpassed that for which I was hoping. It has allowed me to love him even more over the years.

From day one in the hospital after I gave birth, he was there, instantaneously in love with his daughter. He’s so caring and in tune with her needs. He offers her praise and positive reinforcement, and she just can’t get enough of him. Though my daughter and I have a great relationship and bond, If I’m honest, at times, I long for the special closeness they have. Quinn is not just a daddy’s girl, but my husband is definitely a daddy wrapped around his little girl’s finger.

For Father’s Day, he just wanted nothing more than to stay at home spending time with our little six year old, and she just wanted the same. On this day and every day, I am grateful not just for a caring husband but for a loving father who’s showing his little girl her true worth and how she deserves to be treated not just through his words but his actions too.

Here’s to all of the strong fathers and father figures, who offer physical, mental and emotional support and love, not just to their children but the mothers of their children too! May it be returned back to you ten fold. 

All the best,

Tanya

Last Day of School but Many More Days of Tending to the Garden

 

 

Garden for the children: the German meaning of the word kindergarten. This year, my daughter was one of many in that lovely garden. It was the perfect environment to allow her to blossom with a wealth of knowledge, flourish by socializing amongst the other beautiful children while under the tutelage of wonderful teachers who know exactly what it takes to tend to many children burgeoning all at once. 

Quinn has learned and grown much in that magical garden in such a short duration of time. She’s like a little book worm excited to read stacks of books everyday, many on her own. She’s a busy bee, constantly expanding her vocabulary and sharing their meanings. She’s a little scientist exploring the different subjects often eager to share what she’s learned. She’s a caterpillar who went through the metamorphosis process right before my eyes in a multitude of ways. Not only is she a little taller and lost many baby teeth and grew big girl teeth, but she’s matured so much in just just about eight months.

Though her days of kindergarten may be over, I will make sure that I’m doing my part to tend to her growth and development as she continues her education and beyond!

All the best,

Tanya.

Red Carpet Celebration: My Little Girl’s a Super Star Reader!

The luxurious Escalade SUV limo was parked. The plush, red carpet was rolled out, and the “fans” patiently awaited their arrival. One person shouted, “I think I see them!” People positioned themselves with cameras and cell phones ready to take pictures and videos. Then the door opened, and they all came parading out wearing their finest clothes and accessories.

The cheers from the crowd would make you think they were all singers being recognized at the Grammy’s or actors and actresses being recognized at the Emmy’s. But they were all being celebrated for something even more notable: kindergarten through fourth graders who read 100 or more books in a little less than three months!

My little kindergartener was among this small group of children who accomplished this wonderful goal! She read well beyond the 100 book minimum, many on her own with little assistance from me. Fancy Nancy, Pinkalicious, Thelma the Unicorn, Princess Truly and If You Give a Mouse an iPhone were some of her favorites to read. I am so proud of my six year old’s accomplishment and happily cheered her name as she walked the red carpet with the other children and went into the limo.

Afterwards, all of the children were lead by the school librarians and paraded through the halls of the school, along with the parents, where the other children and teachers were all lined up in the hallways to give hi-fives and cheer on the kids for reading so many books. Ending in the library, they were all then celebrated with cake and sparkling apple raspberry cider. I thought it was a wonderful event and an awesome way to reward children for reading. Quinn, along with the other children, all looked and felt like superstars! She’s so excited to keep reading and can’t wait to do the challenge again when she’s in first grade.

All the best,

Tanya

24 Karat Magic in the “Ear” of My Little Girl: Another Major Milestone!

“Are you ready, Quinn? There’s no turning back! Once it’s done, it’s done!” I informed my six year old. She smiled as eager as can be, “I’m ready!” For the past couple of years, my daughter occasionally asked about getting her ears pierced to which her father and I would respond, “Maybe when you’re a little older because this is a major decision. We want to make sure you’re absolutely sure.” We both decided before Quinn was born that we would not pierce her ears until she could verbally tell us that it’s what she wanted instead of making that decision for her.

Since she turned six on May 3rd, the main topic of conversation on a daily basis has been getting her ears pierced. She wanted to know when I got my ears pierced (I was a baby) and why most of her friends in school already have their ears pierced. “I watched a YouTube video where a little girl got hers done at Claire’s, and it only hurt for a split second,” she told me. Baffled, I asked, “How’d you find that video?” My kindergartener, who is a pretty sharp reader and writer, informed me that she typed in kids ear pierce, and the video came up. As a result of this, I knew she meant business. After discussing it with her dad, we decided that it was time and that she’d get it done as a special reward after her kindergarten graduation event.

We headed to Claire’s at Willow Grove Mall, and I probably had more butterflies in my stomach than Quinn. She skipped right up towards the store where I took her “before” pictures, and she was so excited to sit in the ear piercing chair holding their teddy bear, Petunia, who had her ears pierced. After looking at the many earring choices, she settled on 24 karat butterfly earrings: butterflies, what a coincidence!

To make the process easy, the Claire’s ear piercing specialist suggested having both ears done simultaneously to which we all agreed. First, I read over and signed the contract, which was probably the most difficult part with all of the warnings and precautions that must be taken into account to ensure that Quinn’s ears heal properly with no infections. Then the location for the piercings was designated and agreed upon. After that, the intense part of getting the actual ear piercings was performed. Quinn held Petunia and sat very still. Then with two simultaneous, loud clicks, and a quick bat of the eyes from Quinn, she was all done: no tears or scream of pain. “That didn’t hurt at all,” she said proudly.

It was such a magical moment over in a matter of seconds. Afterwards, she smiled so wide looking in the mirror and picked out a few more pairs of earrings to wear when she’s all healed. I told her, “Seeing you with earrings is going to take some getting used to for me. It means you’re really a big girl now!” Quinn just smiled and responded, “I am a big girl, Mommy!”

Though there’s so many more milestones to go, this one really “pierced” my heart letting me know there’s no turning back, and with each passing day my daughter is evolving into a big girl and will one day be a young lady and then a grown woman.

All the best,

Tanya

My Heart Danced to the Rhythm for My Little Girl! A Lesson in Stepping Out of My Comfort Zone with Persistence, Confidence & Positivity

 

“Are you excited about the dance recital, Mommy?” my six year old asked. To which I replied,  “Yes, I’m excited but a little nervous. How about you?” Quinn said, “I’m a little nervous and excited too!” In September, I enrolled my daughter in a local dance school for tap and jazz, and for months, they’ve been preparing for the dance recital which was just held this past Friday and Saturday.

About a couple of months ago, a notice was sent out recruiting moms to do a dance routine as a part of the recital.  As soon as I mentioned it to Quinn, her eyes lit up, and her smile widened. “Mommy, can you please do the mom dance? That would be so cool if we both were in the show!” Initially, I was excited because the song selection was “Rhythm Nation” by Janet Jackson, and the wheels were already turning with how I’d put together my outfit. But when I realized that there’d only be five rehearsals to learn the choreography, (a modified yet still involved version from the video) the anxiety set in big time.

Even though I loved being on the stage many moons ago rapping and doing spoken word,  I was extremely nervous. As a child, I was rhythmically challenged and lacked confidence. I’ve gotten a little better as an adult, but I still consider dancing to be out of my element and not my strong suit. But, I’m proud to say that I did not allow my nervousness to overwhelm me causing  me to bail out of the dance number.

It actually was an experience full of lessons, some old and some new, allowing me to grow as an adult. Even if I do not believe I am the “best” dancer,  I still gave it my all and remained confident on stage even if there was a missed step or two in the routine. Believe me, this was tough for me with my type A personality constantly critiquing my practice performances, but I, for the most part, remained positive and did have a lot of fun.

It felt good teaching by example and making a conscious effort to live by the lessons I try my best to instill in Quinn. What made it even more rewarding was seeing my little girl step out onto the stage full of confidence with a smile on her face.  I hope that as she rewatches my performance in the years to come that she will not just watch me dance with the group of moms but will actually listen to the lyrics of the song, “Rhythm Nation” as they still apply today and still will for many years to come.

“People of the world today
Are we looking for a better way of life
We are a part of the rhythm nation
People of the world unite
Strength in numbers we can get it right
One time
We are a part of the rhythm nation”

All the best,

Tanya

Red, White & Blue: Mommy’s Little Girl’s a Sparkler Too!

“Ooh, it’s sparkling all over, Mommy!” my six year old  said while the sparkler illuminated as she held the end of its stem. This Memorial Day weekend, we had an intimate family cookout to not only remember the fallen soldiers but to celebrate my husband’s birthday too. As my daughter eagerly put on her red, white and blue romper and was ready to spend time with her family, I knew it was going to be a fun time.

As the day went on, I pulled out the sparklers I purchased. These are one of my favorite little fireworks from childhood. Though it may not cause much stimulation for adults, I knew the kids would enjoy them.

When I attempted to light the first sparkler, the wind picked up each time making it more difficult to get a spark. So we had to find a corner to shield the wind and find the right angle to light the sparkler. Even with trying to get the “right” angle, it took a little time. But once we developed a technique and realized that we couldn’t just hold the flame at the tip but had to slowly move it up in down from the tip a few centimeters, we finally go the sparkler ignited. After getting the first one, the others were much easier to do.

My daughter was so patient throughout this process. Yet at first, she was a little nervous about holding the sparkler. But once she did, she held the sparkler confidently and asked, “Can I do another one, please?!” Lighting the sparklers made me think about how much of a sparkler my little girl is. She truly illuminates my world. When her eyes light up about something that sparks interests within her, it fills me with hope and reignites some sparks in me that I thought fizzled years ago.

A sparkler may last just a minute or two, but the fun and experience from holding and waving them, for me, lasted well into adulthood. It is my hope that the passion and hope my daughter currently has will last a lifetime keeping her filled up and determined to leave her spark on the world.

All the best,

Tanya