Tag Archives: Mommy and Me

I Don’t Want to “Let Go,” But I Must Let My Daughter Build Without Me, Occasionally That Is!

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She took a quick look at the next instruction and then surveyed the table in search of the next piece. “Here it is, Mommy!” Quinn said with enthusiasm. She then shared with me, “The pink piece goes right here!” Building with Legos was one of my favorite activities when I was younger. Well, actually, I still enjoy building with Legos, so I enjoy partaking in this activity with my daughter.

Before we got started with her new Lego set, she examined the box and informed me, “It says this is for children who are five years old to twelve, but I can still do it even though I’m four!” I shook my head in agreement and let her know that I can be her helper. “Thanks, Mommy, But I might not need your help. I just have to follow the instructions and pictures.” While I was proud of her wanting to do it by herself, in that moment I was a little disappointed that she didn’t need nor want my help.

She made me think about how there will be times when I need to just be content with observing and letting her take the lead so that she may grow and become her own person. I must be happy that she wants to build on her own and wants to be independent. Now, we can occasionally build using our Legos side by side with her knowing that I am there for her if she needs me to help with instructions or to locate a piece to construct whatever she may be building.

All the best,

Tanya

Happy Starting Off the New Year with Goals and Guidance from My Little Girl (2018)

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“Happy New Year,” my daughter said in a low voice as we all finished the countdown and watching the ball drop. With her party horn by her side and her eyes noticeably heavy, my husband hugged her and gave her a kiss on her forehead saying, “You made it, Quinnie! You made it to midnight! It’s now a new year: 2018! Do you want to blow your party horn?” She silently shook her head no as she gazed at the people celebrating on TV. Her listless response was a sharp contrast to the excitement she had earlier during the countdown2noon at the Please Touch Museum blowing her horn, cheering and dancing around. My poor four year old was determined to stay up to bring in the new year, but she was completely exhausted.

This morning, after getting some much needed sleep, my daughter excitedly informed me, “Today is a new year, Mommy! It’s January 1st, 2018! What would you like to do in the new year?” My response was, “I want to reach the different goals I have for myself.” She then said, as a matter of fact, “You know, you can do whatever you want in the new year. We can even work together to be happy and reach our goals…just like my goal was to stay up for the new year!” I was impressed with her logic.

How sweet, I thought to myself. My daughter has the right idea and is on to something many of us, including me, fail to realize at times. Often, when we establish goals in the new year and focus in how we can accomplish them all on our own when in actuality there are people in our lives who love us, care about us and are more than willing to lend a hand or just a listening ear to help us reach our goals.

Yes, my daughter may only be four years old, but knowing that she loves and supports me and believes in me and my goals makes them that much more attainable. Here’s to a happy new year filled with many goals accomplished (one including more family togetherness) in 2018.

All the best to you and your family in the new year!

Tanya

Mommy’s Monday Moments: Who Said Washing the Car Wasn’t Fun? Not My Little Girl!

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With a soapy sponge about three times the size of her little hand she sung, “This is the was we scrub-a-dub-dub…scrub-a-dub-dub…scrub-a-dub-dub. This is the way we wash the car all day long!” It was a hot day, and when I was younger I loved when my mom would wet me with the hose, so I figured my four year old would like it too and that she could have a little water play as I washed my car. As I prepared the suds water and got my sponge ready, Quinn asked with a sad look on her face and disappointment in her voice , “Where’s my sponge, Mommy? I thought I was was helping to wash your car.”

Needless to say, I was pleasantly surprised that she wanted to take on this chore with me.  So I got a second sponge for her that she was able to out on her hand to make it easier that holding it, and she went to work. I was impressed with how she paid close attention to detail making sure that she scrubbed every part of the car that she could reach even commenting on how dirty my tires were and how she had to scrub those a lot to get them clean.

Sometimes we, as adults, may underestimate the abilities of our children or may even assume that they do not want to do chores, thereby leaving us in awe when our children rise to the challenge and surpass it.  While Quinn just turned four last month, she constantly amazes me with her eagerness to help me do chores around the house from sweeping, vacuuming, doing dishes or simply clearing the table after a meal.

I love how she can make a chore fun and bring out the kid in me. After the car was all suds up, then came the extra fun part. She giggled and asked for more as I sprayed in her direction with the hose cooling her off after all of her hard work. Once the car was all clean, she helped dry it off and then turned to her dad who joined us outside asking, “Daddy, can we clean your car next?”

All the best,

Tanya

Mommy’s Monday Moments: Just Ask “Mommypedia”

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“When birds chirp together, is that how they speak to one another?” “Who decided that green means go and not the color blue?” “How did the doctor get me out of your stomach?” Are just some of the questions my four year old has asked me in the past couple of days. Quinn has always been an inquisitive child; however, the quantity and quality of questions has increased exponentially over the past few months. There are times when I feel like “Mommypedia” (The parental version of Wikipedia) or my daughter’s personal search engine who must yield results and provide an answer immediately because “I don’t know” is usually not acceptable and simply leads to more in-depth follow-up questions.

Of course, the barrage of questions can be overwhelming, and after a long day I may long for a mommy version of Siri or Alexa to answer everything for me. Nevertheless, I am flattered and honored that she looks to me for guidance and clarity and holds my response in a high regard. Also, her questions challenge my critical thinking and make me ponder over why something is the way that it is when I’m too sure, which is a fantastic way to keep me on my toes.

I treasure our conversations  and love how she listens so intently to my responses because I know that similar to some people who come to the realization that just because it’s on the internet it is not necessarily true that she will one day feel that her mommy doesn’t have all the answers. Here’s to all of the “mommypedias” and “daddypedias” trying their best to keep up with the search for answers from their children.
All the best,

Tanya

Can’t Stop the Feeling! Mommy’s Little Girl Loves to Dance

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“I got this feeling inside my bones. It goes electric, wavey when I turn it on…” was not only the lyrics of the song playing for my four year old’s dance recital but how I felt as she did her tap moves with the other children in her class. “I Can’t Stop the Feeling” of excitement, nervousness and being a doting mommy as Quinn tried her best to keep in rhythm and do the steps she memorized for the past few months. Since she was about six months old, I’ve been enrolling her in classes at The Little Gym, and while some parents may choose to enroll their children in a facility that focuses exclusively in dance, I love it here because it is all about the children having fun, and there is not as much pressure to become “professional” dancers. Like her mother, my daughter has an inherent quality which may be a gift and a curse. She tends to be a perfectionist and will keep trying until she gets it just right or even becomes frustrated if she is unable to get it right. With this in mind, the environment at The Little Gym is ideal to help her relax more.

Nevertheless, I would not be totally truthful if I didn’t admit that I was proud that my daughter followed the instructions of her teacher, did not run off during the performance or suffer from stage fright and cry. Also, something that really put a smile on my face is how she handled a mishap with her tiara for the ballet routine. When she did a spin with her partner, it was knocked off of her head. In that moment, I was more anxious than she was as I wondered what she would do next. She simply reached down and put the tiara back on her head to the best of her ability and continued to dance. Now that really put a smile on my face. Even after the performance she said with a big smile on her face, “My tiara came off when I was dancing, so I had to put it back on, Mommy. But I kept dancing!”

After the dance portion, she and the other children displayed some of their skills on the gym equipment. Even though Quinn also inherited her lack of flexibility from her mother (me), she still keeps trying and had a fun time. This summer, Quinn’s going to try out karate at The Little Gym for a new and different experience, and then we’ll return to dance for the school year. This was a wonderful experience for the both of us.

When we prepared to leave, I just couldn’t get those lyrics out of my head, “…Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance. A feeling good, good, creeping up on you, so just dance, dance, dance…” It’s moments like these that make my heart dance and will stay with me always.

All the best,

Tanya

Mommy’s Monday Moments: Stopping to Smell the Flowers with My Little Girl

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“Stop and smell the flowers (or roses)” is an idiomatic expression meaning to take the time to appreciate life and to acknowledge everything, especially the little things we may often take for granted. Something “little” that I most definitely will not take for granted is my little girl. When I was pregnant with her, with the help of my husband and mother, I planted several lillies along the side of the house. I specially recall how sunny and comfortable it was that day and how excited I was to get the flowers planted prior to my daughter’s arrival.

Now, a little over four years later, both Quinn and I look forward to seeing the first lily blossom. Look, Mommy! I see an orange flower!” my little girl excitedly tells me. Then within a matter of days almost all of them have burgeoned. Just like Quinn, the lilies have gotten taller and more colorful. Similar to my four year old’s synapses multiplying, it seems like the amount of lillies has doubled since I initially planted them.

For me, the lillies are a reminder to not just “stop and smell the flowers” but to take time to appreciate how much my little girl is blossoming. Both her father and I must continue to be the sunshine and water she needs to continue to grow, and we look forward to reaping the benefits of what we sow within her moral fiber.

All the best,

Tanya

Terrific Toy Tuesday: Mommy’s Little Bike Riding Co-Pilot

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“Wheeeee! That was fun! Can we do it again, Mommy?” my little girl asked. Just a few weeks ago my daughter turned four years old, and while she can still fit comfortably in her jogging stroller, for the past few months I was looking for a way where we can both get exercise, have fun and spend time together all at once. Her preschool is about a twenty minute brisk walk away from our house but is a bit too long to expect Quinn to walk the entire way. On a couple of occasions, we used her scooter and her little bike, but needless to say it took far longer than twenty minutes for her little legs to get home from school, even with my assistance.

Then I thought about a tandem (two-person) bike but was concerned about her feet reaching the pedals, storage and me just wanting to ride the bike solo yet navigating with an empty seat in the back (This would be my only bike) Then, on Amazon’s website I came across the perfect alternative: the WeeRide Co-Pilot Bike Trailer. It comes in three different color options: pink, green and white. Interestingly, the price does vary depending on the color ranging from about $70 to $80. It is for ages four to nine and a child up to 75 pounds, so we should be able to use it for the next few years with no problem.  I even purchased a Minnie Mouse basket, handlebar streamers and a bell from Target to make it special for Quinn.

Assembly was easier than I anticipated, and hitching her bike onto my newly purchased bike took just a matter of minutes. Now, when I want to ride by myself, I can simply disconnect her bike, but I can reconnect hers back to mine with no problem. Now, instead of the twenty minute brisk walk with the jogging stroller, it takes us about eight minutes. There’s a few hills along the way, which certainly are a challenge, but my four year old pedaled with all her mite to help out and said, “I was pedaling too. We make a good team don’t we, Mommy!” We even have more time to stop by the nearby park with the bikes. This week, there’s a chance of rain almost everyday, and Quinn informed me, “I don’t want it to rain so that we can ride our bikes together.”

We’ve just been riding our bikes for the past couple of weeks since her birthday, but we are already the excited for more outings bike rides through the neighborhood together. I just love having Mommy/daughter time together and hope this will be a memorable moment not just for me but for my daughter too.

All the best,

Tanya

We’re Here! It’s My Fourth Mommyversary!

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“Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy!” my daughter bellowed out with joy. “I have a special gift for you!” It was a lovely flower and a handprint picture too. A little over four years ago I became a mother to a sweet little girl who forever changed my life, my world, even the way I behave and think.

“Just wait until you’re a mom” or “Motherhood has a way of changing you” I’ve heard people say, and with each passing day I find myself uttering these same phrases to new mothers or people who may eventually become parents because it is so true for most parents.

In four years, teenagers experience many changes as they go through puberty and just finding themselves from ninth through twelfth grade. In four years, young adults have to figure out what they want to do with their lives as they attend college and start off as freshmen end as a seniors.

In my four years, while I still know I have a long way to go, I’ve not only watched my daughter grow so much but have observed how much I’ve grown. I’ve actually become less shy and more assertive as I speak up to protect my daughter or to give her a voice when she may be to nervous to speak for herself or just cannot articulate what she means. I’m getting even better at dealing with my own range of emotions , from happiness to sadness to anger and frustration to model the behavior I wish to see in her. While I still struggle with change, as she is constantly growing and evolving and each time I get in rhythm with where she is developmentally a new change occurs, I am able to accept those changes a little more.  I know it is a part of life, and I’m grateful that Quinn is growing into an exceptional little girl. I just hope that I am growing into an exceptional mother and that she never doubts my love for her.

Here’s to all mothers and all that you do for your children! May you celebrate and acknowledge all of the positivity that has come out of motherhood and how it has added something special to your lives. I know motherhood has added a lot to mine.

All the best,

Tanya

Excited for Spring with My Little Girl

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Our Snowman Has Melted
Decorating for Easter
Having fun with Decorations

“Do you know that today is the first day of spring?” my little girl asked with excitement. I responded, “Yes, I do!” “Now that it’s spring, the flowers will start to bloom, the grass will start to grow, and I’ll be able to ride my bike outside and go to the park more!” she exclaimed. “Yes, you’re right again,” I told her. This conversation took place today as we were driving home from her preschool to our partially snow covered yard with melted snow water flowing down the sidewalk and street.

Today, we spent a little time outside reminiscing about our snowman we built last week who has sadly melted away. On the bright side, we put up Easter and spring decorations knowing that sunny, warm spring days are ahead.

We both look forward to each season together. It’s such a blessing to observe Quinn grow and reach milestones while enjoying nature and all the fun that each season encompasses with my little girl. Here’s to kite flying, bike riding, nature walks, trips to the zoo and just spending time with each other. Here’s to “springing” into more outdoor fun!

All the best,

Tanya

Snowy Day with My Little Girl

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“Let’s have fun on this snowy day just like Peter,” my daughter insisted as she started to lie down in the snow to make a snow angel. The snowfall this year has been minimal, and she would ask me quite frequently, “When it it going to snow, Mommy?” So my daughter and I were both excited to have enough snow to play in even if it is supposed to be spring next week.

Quinn wanted to make everything from foot prints in the snow to a snow angel, to snow balls to a snow man, just like we read in Ezra Jack Keats’ book Snowy Day. I think it’s wonderful that the book inspired her, well inspired us both. Yes, shoveling the heavy snow for a path way and digging out my car may not be much fun, but at least it’s good exercise and leads up to me playing with my soon-to-be four year old in the snow.

To top it off, we came in the house and and enjoyed some tasty hot cocoa. Then Quinn said, “Thank you Mommy for playing with me on this snowy day!” his really put a smile on my face, and I hope his will be a lasting memory for her like it was for me. I’m so happy we got the snowy day we’ve both been longing for, which was a terrific way to close out the winter.

All the best,

Tanya