Tag Archives: Tanya Harris Franklin

Mommy’s Monday Moments: Just Ask “Mommypedia”

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“When birds chirp together, is that how they speak to one another?” “Who decided that green means go and not the color blue?” “How did the doctor get me out of your stomach?” Are just some of the questions my four year old has asked me in the past couple of days. Quinn has always been an inquisitive child; however, the quantity and quality of questions has increased exponentially over the past few months. There are times when I feel like “Mommypedia” (The parental version of Wikipedia) or my daughter’s personal search engine who must yield results and provide an answer immediately because “I don’t know” is usually not acceptable and simply leads to more in-depth follow-up questions.

Of course, the barrage of questions can be overwhelming, and after a long day I may long for a mommy version of Siri or Alexa to answer everything for me. Nevertheless, I am flattered and honored that she looks to me for guidance and clarity and holds my response in a high regard. Also, her questions challenge my critical thinking and make me ponder over why something is the way that it is when I’m too sure, which is a fantastic way to keep me on my toes.

I treasure our conversations  and love how she listens so intently to my responses because I know that similar to some people who come to the realization that just because it’s on the internet it is not necessarily true that she will one day feel that her mommy doesn’t have all the answers. Here’s to all of the “mommypedias” and “daddypedias” trying their best to keep up with the search for answers from their children.
All the best,

Tanya

Can’t Stop the Feeling! Mommy’s Little Girl Loves to Dance

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“I got this feeling inside my bones. It goes electric, wavey when I turn it on…” was not only the lyrics of the song playing for my four year old’s dance recital but how I felt as she did her tap moves with the other children in her class. “I Can’t Stop the Feeling” of excitement, nervousness and being a doting mommy as Quinn tried her best to keep in rhythm and do the steps she memorized for the past few months. Since she was about six months old, I’ve been enrolling her in classes at The Little Gym, and while some parents may choose to enroll their children in a facility that focuses exclusively in dance, I love it here because it is all about the children having fun, and there is not as much pressure to become “professional” dancers. Like her mother, my daughter has an inherent quality which may be a gift and a curse. She tends to be a perfectionist and will keep trying until she gets it just right or even becomes frustrated if she is unable to get it right. With this in mind, the environment at The Little Gym is ideal to help her relax more.

Nevertheless, I would not be totally truthful if I didn’t admit that I was proud that my daughter followed the instructions of her teacher, did not run off during the performance or suffer from stage fright and cry. Also, something that really put a smile on my face is how she handled a mishap with her tiara for the ballet routine. When she did a spin with her partner, it was knocked off of her head. In that moment, I was more anxious than she was as I wondered what she would do next. She simply reached down and put the tiara back on her head to the best of her ability and continued to dance. Now that really put a smile on my face. Even after the performance she said with a big smile on her face, “My tiara came off when I was dancing, so I had to put it back on, Mommy. But I kept dancing!”

After the dance portion, she and the other children displayed some of their skills on the gym equipment. Even though Quinn also inherited her lack of flexibility from her mother (me), she still keeps trying and had a fun time. This summer, Quinn’s going to try out karate at The Little Gym for a new and different experience, and then we’ll return to dance for the school year. This was a wonderful experience for the both of us.

When we prepared to leave, I just couldn’t get those lyrics out of my head, “…Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance. A feeling good, good, creeping up on you, so just dance, dance, dance…” It’s moments like these that make my heart dance and will stay with me always.

All the best,

Tanya

Mommy’s Monday Moments: Stopping to Smell the Flowers with My Little Girl

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“Stop and smell the flowers (or roses)” is an idiomatic expression meaning to take the time to appreciate life and to acknowledge everything, especially the little things we may often take for granted. Something “little” that I most definitely will not take for granted is my little girl. When I was pregnant with her, with the help of my husband and mother, I planted several lillies along the side of the house. I specially recall how sunny and comfortable it was that day and how excited I was to get the flowers planted prior to my daughter’s arrival.

Now, a little over four years later, both Quinn and I look forward to seeing the first lily blossom. Look, Mommy! I see an orange flower!” my little girl excitedly tells me. Then within a matter of days almost all of them have burgeoned. Just like Quinn, the lilies have gotten taller and more colorful. Similar to my four year old’s synapses multiplying, it seems like the amount of lillies has doubled since I initially planted them.

For me, the lillies are a reminder to not just “stop and smell the flowers” but to take time to appreciate how much my little girl is blossoming. Both her father and I must continue to be the sunshine and water she needs to continue to grow, and we look forward to reaping the benefits of what we sow within her moral fiber.

All the best,

Tanya

Terrific Toy Tuesday: Mommy’s Little Bike Riding Co-Pilot

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“Wheeeee! That was fun! Can we do it again, Mommy?” my little girl asked. Just a few weeks ago my daughter turned four years old, and while she can still fit comfortably in her jogging stroller, for the past few months I was looking for a way where we can both get exercise, have fun and spend time together all at once. Her preschool is about a twenty minute brisk walk away from our house but is a bit too long to expect Quinn to walk the entire way. On a couple of occasions, we used her scooter and her little bike, but needless to say it took far longer than twenty minutes for her little legs to get home from school, even with my assistance.

Then I thought about a tandem (two-person) bike but was concerned about her feet reaching the pedals, storage and me just wanting to ride the bike solo yet navigating with an empty seat in the back (This would be my only bike) Then, on Amazon’s website I came across the perfect alternative: the WeeRide Co-Pilot Bike Trailer. It comes in three different color options: pink, green and white. Interestingly, the price does vary depending on the color ranging from about $70 to $80. It is for ages four to nine and a child up to 75 pounds, so we should be able to use it for the next few years with no problem.  I even purchased a Minnie Mouse basket, handlebar streamers and a bell from Target to make it special for Quinn.

Assembly was easier than I anticipated, and hitching her bike onto my newly purchased bike took just a matter of minutes. Now, when I want to ride by myself, I can simply disconnect her bike, but I can reconnect hers back to mine with no problem. Now, instead of the twenty minute brisk walk with the jogging stroller, it takes us about eight minutes. There’s a few hills along the way, which certainly are a challenge, but my four year old pedaled with all her mite to help out and said, “I was pedaling too. We make a good team don’t we, Mommy!” We even have more time to stop by the nearby park with the bikes. This week, there’s a chance of rain almost everyday, and Quinn informed me, “I don’t want it to rain so that we can ride our bikes together.”

We’ve just been riding our bikes for the past couple of weeks since her birthday, but we are already the excited for more outings bike rides through the neighborhood together. I just love having Mommy/daughter time together and hope this will be a memorable moment not just for me but for my daughter too.

All the best,

Tanya

Mommy’s Monday Moments: Growth Off the Charts for My Little Girl

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“How tall am I now, Mommy?” my daughter inquired. Even though we measure Quinn occasionally throughout the year, as part of her birthday, we write it down on her chart so that she can see how much she’s grown, so a couple of weeks ago when she turned four, she was excited to get measured. “So I was 30 inches when I was one, and now I’m 43 inches tall at four?” she asked. “That’s correct, Quinn,” I informed her.

She was so impressed with how much she’s grown and even asked, “How come I didn’t grow as much from when I was three like I did when I was two or one?” Interestingly, in the past year I’ve observed her grow in her ability to articulate how she’s feeling and what she wants, to ask questions and get the answers she’s looking for and just an overall increase in her cognitive development. Actually, her doctor said she’s the height of the average five and a half year old.

As Quinn, her dad and I  saw how much she’s grown just by looking at the lines on the height chart, I think were all amazed at how far she is come and are excited to see how much she will continue to grow. My baby is growing up so much in such a short period of time. It’s moments like these when I utter that cliché phrase, “Where did the time go?”

All the best,

Tanya

Terrific Toy Tuesday: Mommy’s Little Princess

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2017-05-03 18.19.04“I look just like Cinderella, Mommy!” my little girl exclaimed as she twirled around in her new dress-up outfit holding her Cinderella doll she also just received for her birthday. In the past my daughter wanted to dress up as a chef, hair stylist, doctor and even an astronaut, but she was equally happy to dress up as a Disney princess for the first time.

Interestingly, some parents may frown upon the idea of their daughter playing with a Disney princess and may critique the “happily ever after” stories in a harsh manner because they feel that most of the stories demonstrate weak female characters who rely on men to save them. While there may be some validity to this, I say let kids be kids. I think we sometimes don’t give our children enough credit when it comes to thinking for themselves and not believing that every aspect of a fairytale is real or ideal.

There once was a time when there was no diversity nor multiculturalism when it came to Disney Princesses, but today they have come so far. With this in mind, some parents believe their child should only play with dolls that look like them . Even though I understand this line of thinking, I do not necessarily agree with it. Whatever doll my daughter wishes to play with, regardless of color, is absolutely fine with me, and she is still at that age where she has a certain level of innocence where she does not focus on color but just on the interactions and fun she has.

Whether it be a princess or doctor outfit, a Cinderella doll or Doc Mcstuffins, imaginative play is a wonderful way to engage learning while having fun! I’m glad Quinn loves her new dress-up outfit and doll.

All the best,

Tanya

We’re Here! It’s My Fourth Mommyversary!

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“Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy!” my daughter bellowed out with joy. “I have a special gift for you!” It was a lovely flower and a handprint picture too. A little over four years ago I became a mother to a sweet little girl who forever changed my life, my world, even the way I behave and think.

“Just wait until you’re a mom” or “Motherhood has a way of changing you” I’ve heard people say, and with each passing day I find myself uttering these same phrases to new mothers or people who may eventually become parents because it is so true for most parents.

In four years, teenagers experience many changes as they go through puberty and just finding themselves from ninth through twelfth grade. In four years, young adults have to figure out what they want to do with their lives as they attend college and start off as freshmen end as a seniors.

In my four years, while I still know I have a long way to go, I’ve not only watched my daughter grow so much but have observed how much I’ve grown. I’ve actually become less shy and more assertive as I speak up to protect my daughter or to give her a voice when she may be to nervous to speak for herself or just cannot articulate what she means. I’m getting even better at dealing with my own range of emotions , from happiness to sadness to anger and frustration to model the behavior I wish to see in her. While I still struggle with change, as she is constantly growing and evolving and each time I get in rhythm with where she is developmentally a new change occurs, I am able to accept those changes a little more.  I know it is a part of life, and I’m grateful that Quinn is growing into an exceptional little girl. I just hope that I am growing into an exceptional mother and that she never doubts my love for her.

Here’s to all mothers and all that you do for your children! May you celebrate and acknowledge all of the positivity that has come out of motherhood and how it has added something special to your lives. I know motherhood has added a lot to mine.

All the best,

Tanya

Excited for Spring with My Little Girl

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Our Snowman Has Melted
Decorating for Easter
Having fun with Decorations

“Do you know that today is the first day of spring?” my little girl asked with excitement. I responded, “Yes, I do!” “Now that it’s spring, the flowers will start to bloom, the grass will start to grow, and I’ll be able to ride my bike outside and go to the park more!” she exclaimed. “Yes, you’re right again,” I told her. This conversation took place today as we were driving home from her preschool to our partially snow covered yard with melted snow water flowing down the sidewalk and street.

Today, we spent a little time outside reminiscing about our snowman we built last week who has sadly melted away. On the bright side, we put up Easter and spring decorations knowing that sunny, warm spring days are ahead.

We both look forward to each season together. It’s such a blessing to observe Quinn grow and reach milestones while enjoying nature and all the fun that each season encompasses with my little girl. Here’s to kite flying, bike riding, nature walks, trips to the zoo and just spending time with each other. Here’s to “springing” into more outdoor fun!

All the best,

Tanya

Proud Parents, Praise and Positive Reinforcement

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“Are you so proud of me for putting my clothes on all by myself?” My little girl inquires with a smile on her face and my reflection in her brown eyes. If she displays a unbecoming behavior, she may ask, “Are you disappointed in me?” I remember when I was younger and how I lived for the praise of my parents and was so disappointed in myself if I disappointed them. I was such a sensitive child and wanted nothing more than to please my parents and can see that same sensitivity and desire to please when I look at my daughter and listen to the inflection in her voice.

There’s such a thin line between overly doting over a child and giving him or her the praise necessary to thrive, feel loved, reinforce positive behaviors and be successful. With this in mind, I often wonder if I’m on target with my daughter and if she knows how proud I am of her. Even as an adult, I often look for the approval of my parents, and while I seldom receive that phrase, “I’m proud of you!” from my father, I’m blessed that my mother has always demonstrated it because her praise and support has helped to shape me into who I am today.

Gratefully, Quinn has a father and mother who acknowledge her efforts and offer her positive reinforcement. Though there may be times when she may do something that upsets us or that we do not agree with, I hope she always knows how proud of her we are and how much we love her. I pray that as she gets older she will also be proud of herself and who she becomes in life.

All the best,

Tanya

Snowy Day with My Little Girl

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“Let’s have fun on this snowy day just like Peter,” my daughter insisted as she started to lie down in the snow to make a snow angel. The snowfall this year has been minimal, and she would ask me quite frequently, “When it it going to snow, Mommy?” So my daughter and I were both excited to have enough snow to play in even if it is supposed to be spring next week.

Quinn wanted to make everything from foot prints in the snow to a snow angel, to snow balls to a snow man, just like we read in Ezra Jack Keats’ book Snowy Day. I think it’s wonderful that the book inspired her, well inspired us both. Yes, shoveling the heavy snow for a path way and digging out my car may not be much fun, but at least it’s good exercise and leads up to me playing with my soon-to-be four year old in the snow.

To top it off, we came in the house and and enjoyed some tasty hot cocoa. Then Quinn said, “Thank you Mommy for playing with me on this snowy day!” his really put a smile on my face, and I hope his will be a lasting memory for her like it was for me. I’m so happy we got the snowy day we’ve both been longing for, which was a terrific way to close out the winter.

All the best,

Tanya