Today was my three year old’s second dance class, and she’s doing a wonderful job transitioning and not having me in the class with her. Unfortunately, the inevitable happened within a blink of an eye. As I looked through the glass observing Quinn have fun following along with the dance instructions, another little girl, who was having a hard time and refused to hold Quinn’s hand as the teacher instructed, decided she would take out her aggression on my daughter with a quick swat to the back of her head.
My little girl’s demeanor quickly changed as her smile morphed into a frown with tears welling up in her eyes. Though she tried to maintain her composure and did not burst out crying, it took everything in me to contain myself and remain in my seat as I muffled my deep sigh which caught the attention of the other parents except the one whose child hit mine, of course. The teacher handled it very well and stopped class to discuss why hitting is not allowed and not nice, but I found myself feeling helpless. I was not able to protect her, and I really am not sure what technique I should have her employ to address aggressive children who choose to hit her or put their hands on her.
When I was younger, I was not aggressive and did not like confrontation nor conflict. Quinn seems to be the same way. My dad would say, “If someone hits you, you better hit them back!” I just did not agree with this way of handling it then and do not now. On the other hand, I dreaded being bullied and found myself at the end of harsh treatment from children quite often. I want Quinn to stand up for herself but in a civil way. I asked her if she enjoyed class today, and she said, “I had fun until someone hit me. Why did she hit me, Mommy?” It upset me quite a bit, and all I could tell her at this point was, “If someone hits you, tell them to please stop and that it is not nice to hit.” I know this may not solve all of the future problems, but for now I think it is age appropriate. I hope and pray that there will not be many more situations like this, but Momma Bear needs to be ready when and if they do.
All the best,