Life Lessons of Winning & Losing: Fun & Games with My Little Girl

“Let’s play a different game!” my five year old insisted as she started putting away the “Connect Four” pieces. “Why?” I asked. To which she quickly replied, “You won the past two games!” Yesterday, we spent a few hours playing games from Hungry Hippos (a classic for me), Disney’s Surprise Slides, which is a variation of Shoots and Ladders, Who Shook Hook, Guess Who and a few others.

I can easily recall when I was younger having game day with my mom and my siblings. Though I enjoyed this family time, I often struggled with being a sore loser when we played “Sorry” or “Old Maid,” which I always seemed to be. It might have been the feeling that I’d never win, the hope that my mom would just let me win or even the occasional taunting from my siblings, but there were times when my eyes would fill with tears, and I’d utter those famous five words, “I don’t want to play anymore!”

Now that I’m older, losing isn’t necessarily easier to accept, but I am able to look at it through a different lens for the sake of my daughter. Though she handles losing much better than I did at her age, I can tell that it still upsets her. As we play games together, we laugh, have fun and hi five, there are also opportunities to discuss life as it correlates to games.

I told her that we all need to learn how to lose and win gracefully. We also discussed how we all can improve with practice, as she did with “Connect Four. When we first started playing when she was around three years old, she was still learning the concept of the game of getting four in a row, and diagonal was definitely tricky. Yesterday, she was really strategizing by making sure to block me and really gave me a run for my money. She legitimately won quite a few times without me going easy on her and just needs to balance blocking me while keeping an eye out for how she can get four in a row simultaneously.

Quinnie’s technique actually made me think about how people, sometimes focus so much on blocking others from winning that they still wind up losing because they aren’t paying attention when the opportunities for them to win present themselves. We went over how her strategy will continue to improve and played a few more rounds before moving on to “Hungry Hippos.”

I am so proud of her for her willingness to keep playing even when she was not winning. She even learned with Disney’s Surprise Slides that it’s not over until it’s over. She was far ahead on the board, and I managed to catch up with her. She then kept saying with each turn, “I don’t think I’m going to win!” But she still kept playing. I was on her tail, when she spun the red Mickey Mouse to win the game. A big smile was plastered on her face as she said, “I can’t believe it! I won! I thought I was losing for sure!” That’s when I told her, “Sometimes that’s how it goes! You think you’re going to lose, but you still win. That’s why you always keep trying your best!” We learn so much from life but sometimes more from games reflecting how life works.

All the best,

Tanya

Grateful to See the New Year of 2019 with My Little Girl

The last few weeks of 2018 were a roller coaster ride for my family as we dealt with my daughter being ill and hospitalized and then rejoiced in her being home for Christmas and having a great recovery. Even though gratitude is something that I try to practice and teach my daughter regularly, I decided in 2019 I would make a more conscious effort. I also made a resolution to be even more present with my family.

Both my daughter and I received gratitude journals as Christmas gifts, so I thought it would be awesome for us to talk and write together about that for which we are grateful. It’s also a perfect way to promote writing with my little kindergartener. We started our journals on January 1st and actually were grateful for the same thing: a visit from my mom (her nana) and my aunt (her great aunt).

It pleases me that my daughter is grateful for her family because I certainly am grateful for her. I’m looking forward to bonding and sharing wonderful moments together with my five year old as we write about that for which we are grateful throughout 2019.

All the best,

Tanya

Baking Up Memories with My Little Girl

 

“I’m so excited, Mommy! I want to do everything from start to finish!” my five year old informed me as we prepared to bake chocolate chip cookies for Thanksgiving. Though it can be time-consuming, and it’s difficult to always carve out time to do it, I love baking. I especially love baking with my daughter. Now that she’s in kindergarten, she’s starting to read, is understanding the concept of measuring more and more and really was able to do just about everything from start to finish, with the exclusion of putting and taking the cookies out of the oven.

As we stood in the kitchen together, we bonded and talked about how excited we were to share our cookies with the family for Thanksgiving. Quinn even said, “I really love baking with you mommy. We ought to do it more often!” I agreed. It is such a wonderful feeling to see her applying what I’ve taught her over the years. I did not have to remind her how to sift the ingredients. Using the Kitchen Aid mixer is a no brainer for her. Without me suggesting, she said, “I’m going to start the mixer on the lowest setting firs so that the flour doesn’t go everywhere. Then I’ll flick the switch so it can mix the cookie dough faster. She was able to use the cookie scoop with ease, and even knew the importance of not putting the cookies too close to one another of the baking sheet.

This experience made me think of an analogy with my little girl. Before she was born, she was “baking” in my stomach until it was time for her to come out. Now, I often observe her “baking up” some ideas and searching for life “ingredients.”  She’s on her way to becoming a master chef, and it comforts me to know that I’m playing a role in sharing my recipes for heartfelt moments that she will be able to use to cook up a wonderful life for herself.

All the best,

Tanya

What Do You Call a Fairy & and Mermaid? Mommy and Daughter Halloween Fun!

Halloween is such a fun time of year not just for my daughter but for me too. What makes it extra fun is the strengthening of our mommy/daughter bond. Since she was two, she began picking out a costume not just for herself but for me too. She’s been Doc McStuffins, and I’ve been Lambie. When she was three, she was an astronaut, and I was her rocket. Last year, she was Snow White, and I was the Evil Queen. This year, she decided to be a fairy and asked me to be a mermaid with a similar color scheme: purple as her favorite color and blue as my favorite color. I thought to myself, what a great idea! She’s already thinking about next year wanting to be a princess so that I can be her unicorn, and I love it!

I feel like dressing up together, going to parties, special events and trick or treating brings out the best in us both and brings us closer together. Sometimes, life just gets so hectic, and work even gets stressful, so I thank my daughter for allowing me to just have fun and enjoy life as different characters. Here’s to a happy fun-filled Halloween. Time with my daughter is the ultimate treat!

My Birthdays Are So Special With My Little Girl!

On October 11th, I reached my own milestone and turned a year older. While the level of excitement is not the same as it once was when I was younger, my daughter’s enthusiasm and secretive planning for my big day truly made me feel special. Her planning actually started in the summer. I would overhear her whispering to my husband (her dad) about what she’d like to do and what she gift she would like to get me.

So when the day finally arrived, she could not contain herself. I have to leave early in the morning to get to work and did not see her until the afternoon, so as soon as she arrived home from school, she screamed out, “Happy birthday, Mommy!” and gave me a big, long hug. “We have special plans for you,” she informed me. My five year old selected Outback Steakhouse as the restaurant. “I know you love their salmon and baked sweet potato, Mommy,” she said. I thought to myself, wow, she knows me so well. Usually, she sits next to her dad, but she said that she wanted to sit next to me since it was my birthday.

At the restaurant, she presented her card and gift to me. The card’s wording was perfect and selected by Quinn. The gift was a beautiful key locket necklace. My husband later told me that she picked it out herself and insisted on getting me a pretty necklace since she knows I like wearing them. She even gave input on the cake and wanted blue to be used since it is my favorite color.

Knowing that my daughter is so caring and was excited to make me happy for my birthday warms my heart and is truly the best gift I could ever ask for.

All the best,

Tanya

Mother and Daughter Twins: Flattery from my Little Girl

“Mommy, do you think we can dress alike or wear the same colors for the performance tonight?” My daughter asked. “Sure, honey. Why do you like dressing alike?” I inquired. To which Quinn exclaimed, “I love when we’re twins! Then I’m just like you! Do you like being me twin?” I smiled and said, “Of course, I do.”

Since my daughter was a baby, I’d often dress us alike or in color coordinated. Now that she’s almost five, it melts my heart that she wants to dress alike and will request that we do. Though, in my opinion, she resembles her father more than she resembles me, I am so flattered that she wants to be just like me. We do have similar mannerisms and personality traits. Many people often tell me that I am a caring and thoughtful person. These are attributes I clearly see in her.

Of course, I would never intentionally try to make my daughter a carbon copy of me. I simply want her to learn from me and always put forth her best effort. It am, however, flattered that my sweet girl looks up to me and wants to be my twin.

All the best,

Tanya

I Don’t Want to “Let Go,” But I Must Let My Daughter Build Without Me, Occasionally That Is!

She took a quick look at the next instruction and then surveyed the table in search of the next piece. “Here it is, Mommy!” Quinn said with enthusiasm. She then shared with me, “The pink piece goes right here!” Building with Legos was one of my favorite activities when I was younger. Well, actually, I still enjoy building with Legos, so I enjoy partaking in this activity with my daughter.

Before we got started with her new Lego set, she examined the box and informed me, “It says this is for children who are five years old to twelve, but I can still do it even though I’m four!” I shook my head in agreement and let her know that I can be her helper. “Thanks, Mommy, But I might not need your help. I just have to follow the instructions and pictures.” While I was proud of her wanting to do it by herself, in that moment I was a little disappointed that she didn’t need nor want my help.

She made me think about how there will be times when I need to just be content with observing and letting her take the lead so that she may grow and become her own person. I must be happy that she wants to build on her own and wants to be independent. Now, we can occasionally build using our Legos side by side with her knowing that I am there for her if she needs me to help with instructions or to locate a piece to construct whatever she may be building.

All the best,

Tanya

Unconditional Love for My Little Girl: “I’ll Be There!” (Jackson 5)

I asked, “What music would you like to listen to for breakfast, Quinn?” Without hesitation, my four year old responded, “Jackson 5, please!” Last year, during the Christmas season, my daughter became a huge fan of the Jackson 5. She loves dancing and singing along to their songs, many that were out before I was even born. She enjoys their music so much so that she was still requesting that I play the Christmas album well into the summer. So I decided to purchase a compilation of their best songs about a month ago so that I could stop randomly humming their Christmas tunes.

While she loves all of the songs, she’ll often request that I replay “ABC” or “I’ll Be There.” “Just call my name, and I’ll be there!” Quinn sings out with her arms outstretched. Though I’ve always loved this song too and heard it several times, I most recently had a different interpretation of it. Perhaps it was the innocence of Michael’s voice or the spirit of the song, but I envisioned singing this song to my daughter to display the unconditional love I have for her and continued support I will offer.

“I’ll Be There” lyrics

…I’ll reach out my hand to you

I’ll have faith in all you do

Just call my name and I’ll be there (I’ll be there)

I’ll be there to comfort you

Build my world of dreams around you

I’m so glad that I found you

I’ll be there with a love that’s strong

I’ll be your strength

I’ll keep holdin’ on (holdin’ on)

Yes I will, yes I will

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter

Togetherness, girl, is all I’m after

Whenever you need me, I’ll be there (I’ll be there)

I’ll be there to protect you (yeah baby)

With unselfish love that respects you

Just call my name, I’ll be there (I’ll be there)

I’ll be there to comfort you

Build my world of dreams around you

I’m so glad that I found you…

I’ve been blessed to experience love through my family, friends and husband, but the love I have for my little girl is stronger than I ever imagined it could be. As she gets older and becomes more independent, she may not need me as much, but I’ll be there. Even when she may not make the best decisions or upsets me, I’ll be there.

One of my dreams is to give my daughter a life filled with joy and laughter, to be there to protect her, and to be there to comfort her. My dream is that she knows I’ll be there whenever she needs me.

Thank you, Jackson 5 for this classic, heartfelt song that now leaves a bit emotional as I think about the bond and love I have for my daughter.

All the best,

Tanya

Mommy’s Monday Moments: My Little Girl’s Dancing Without Me, & I Couldn’t Be More Proud

Dance Class

Quinn in Her First Dance Class (The Other Children’s Faces Are Intentionally Blurred)

Yesterday, I posted a blog entry on my three year old transitioning from our mommy and me class to an independent class at the Little Gym. I was a little nervous since this was her first class without me, and I knew I would miss our class together. Today was her first dance class, and my little girl made me very proud as she followed the instructions of the teacher (at least 90 percent of the time) and danced around eagerly in her little tap shoes and then ballet shoes along with the other children.

Her former teacher at The Little Gym jokingly commented on how I was nervously pacing the floor looking into the classroom through the glass window while Quinn was full of smiles and probably wouldn’t have even noticed if I stepped out of the waiting area. While part of me wanted her to miss me and long for my presence in the classroom, it makes me feel good that Quinn is growing up and becoming more independent. Though I could see what was happening though the large glass window, it was a different experience for me because I could not hear all of what was going on in the classroom, and Quinn certainly could not hear me over the music and instruction from the teacher with it being in a separate room.  This is a perfect example of the experiences to come. Sometimes there will be limitations on what I can do as Quinn’s mommy, and I may be forced to just observe as she makes decisions as my big, little girl. Here’s to fun-filled classes for Quinn and her continued growth and development socially, mentally, emotionally and intellectually!

All the best,

Tanya

 

Bye Bye Mommy & Me Class: Will My Little Girl Miss You as Much as I Will?

2016-06-01 11.00.51It’s official! My daughter and I attended our last parent and child class at the Little Gym last week. Now that she’s three, my big girl will be in class all by herself this upcoming Monday. I remember starting class with her when she was just six months old and just crawling around, giggling and babbling. Now she’s jumping, running and climbing and able to verbalize how she feels and what she’s thinking.

2016-06-01 10.42.12When I asked her what type of class she would like to do for the summer, she excitedly said, “I want to do a dance class, Mommy!” While my little girl loves to dance around the house, makes up her own little fancy moves and is very eager to wear her little tap and ballet shoes, I’m not too sure if she understands that I will not be in the class with her tomorrow. It does, however, it please me to know that she is already familiar with the teacher and really enjoys going to The Little Gym.

She does a wonderful job following the teacher’s directions and staying focused when we’re in class together, so I’m confident that she will be able to do this even when I’m not right there with her.  This class will also be a wonderful transition for us both since Quinn will begin attending preschool in September for the first time. Wow, my little girl is growing up so quickly, and I’m so glad we were able to have so many memorable moments together in class at The Little Gym.

All the best,

Tanya