“I have something for you, Mommy,” my little girl told me. It wasn’t Mother’s Day, not my birthday nor Christmas. What could it be, I thought? Probably a picture she drew or a craft she made at camp. “You have something for me?” I asked. “For you and Daddy,” Quinn responded. It was a special note she wrote that said, “For Mom and Dad.” Inside, it read, “You are kind an loveing. love Quinn.” While the English professor in me was tempted to tell her she spelled loving incorrectly, I was just so moved by the kind gesture of my six year old.
I inquired, “Did your camp counselor ask you all to write notes to your parents?” Quinn quickly said, “No! I just wanted to write you and Daddy a note to thank you for being kind and loving.” Even though we’ve both been keeping gratitude journals since the start of the year and often talk about the importance of expressing gratitude and thanking people for their generosity and kindness, I was still pleasantly surprised to get such a lovely note from Quinn. She truly is a loving and caring daughter for which I am grateful.
Playing games, reading and painting activities at home. Fun trips to the park and zoo, countless restaurants, and of course, Sesame Place. Grover has seen so much and been through so much in his five years with my daughter, Quinn. When we went to see “Toy Story 4,” along with Grover as one of Quinn’s companions, it made me think about all of the treasured moments my six year old and Grover have had together.
Grover entered her life around one years old as a surprise gift when her father and I had our first date night where she spent the night at my mother’s house for the first time. I wanted to give her something special when we returned, and when I saw Grover at the local toy store in Peddlers Village, I was immediately drawn to him and knew he would be perfect for her. Plus, Grover was always one of my favorite Sesame Street characters.
Quinn loved Grover from day one. He offered her comfort at night and during naps. She even made a Grover pumpkin for Halloween one year. Even now, he can often be found either on her lap or on the passenger seat next to her when we’re going on a car ride somewhere. In his five years, my heart raced as we scrambled around the zoo in search of Grover who was somehow left at the picnic bench. One time, we had to retrieve him from the local Marshall’s store from the front desk after I asked the question I’ve posed hundreds of times or that Quinn asked me, “Where’s Grover?!”
From his years of being loved so much, he’s endured several machine washings and three “eye” surgeries to restore his sight from his pupils wearing away. Even though his lip is busted some, he still smiles alongside Quinn knowing that Elmo and a plethora of other stuffed animals have failed to take his place.
Sadly, both Grover and I know that his days are numbered as Quinn gets older and continues to become more interested in her American Girl doll, but for now, she still loves him so much and still includes him in tea parties and outings. Grover has a special place in my heart too. He has allowed me to see how affectionate Quinn can be, and with her being an only child, she finds comfort in having him as her near and dear friend.
If only Grover could talk, the stories he’d tell! I hope he’s enjoying being a part of our family as much as we enjoy having him be a part of ours.
“I just love nature! Don’t you, mommy? What do you think we’ll see?” my daughter asked when she found out we were going on a nature hike with our cousins. “Did you ever go on nature hikes when you were younger, Mommy?” Quinn asked. “Yes, I did, and I really enjoyed them,” I told her. “Now, you get to go on a nature hike with me as an adult. Isn’t that cool?”
Even though Quinn and I regularly go for walks, it’s been quite some time since we explored nature together surrounded by thousands of trees, so this was a real treat for us both. We met up with our cousins at the Wissahickon Valley Park Trail in Philadelphia at Bells Mill entrance, and my six year old and her five year old were eager to get hiking. There were no iPads, tablets or technology to stimulate them, yet they were both intrigued by just about everything from the rocks, to the streams, to the trees to the insects, to the animals to the actual leaves on the trees.
It didn’t take long for the girls to want to take a back trail climbing over fallen trees and mountainous rocks. My cousin and I were impressed with how well they did. They were mindful of their surroundings wanting to stop frequently to take in the sights. Both Quinn and Ellie walked carefully so they wouldn’t lose their footing and were very brave when we came across steep, narrow and rocky areas on the path.
They had fun simply playing with sticks, racing to catch up with me and interacting with the butterflies, chipmunks and worms too. One of the highlights was feeding the geese bread. Though the birds eventually became a bit aggressive in pursuit of more bread, the girls were absolutely tickled and ran off squealing as they were chased by the geese. “That was fun and gave us exercise too,” Quinn said.
As we headed back to our cars after three hours of walking and exploring, Quinn asked, “Mommy, do you think we can come back here again to explore? Maybe next time with Daddy?” To which I responded, “Definitely!” I can’t wait to go on the next hike with Quinn. This will certainly be one of our go-to activities together.
Ever heard the phrase, “You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family?” If you think about it, this is only partially true. While I didn’t get to pick my own parents, I did get to pick who I would start a family with. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the best relationship with my father and was often emotionally and verbally abused by him (when my mother was not present) as a child causing me to lack self-esteem and often feel depressed. I was elated when my parents divorced because I was no longer subjected to my father’s ill treatment and vowed that I would try my best to protect my future child from suffering the same fate at the hands of her own father.
Gratefully, I was lucky enough to find a dear friend and significant other of nearly twenty years, and we’ve been married going on eight years. Sometimes, we fall in love with people but don’t take the time to envision how they will be as parents or they unpleasantly surprise us once we’re married revealing a person we didn’t realize was there. With this in mind, I feel so blessed that how I envisioned my husband as a parent based on his beliefs and values actually surpassed that for which I was hoping. It has allowed me to love him even more over the years.
From day one in the hospital after I gave birth, he was there, instantaneously in love with his daughter. He’s so caring and in tune with her needs. He offers her praise and positive reinforcement, and she just can’t get enough of him. Though my daughter and I have a great relationship and bond, If I’m honest, at times, I long for the special closeness they have. Quinn is not just a daddy’s girl, but my husband is definitely a daddy wrapped around his little girl’s finger.
For Father’s Day, he just wanted nothing more than to stay at home spending time with our little six year old, and she just wanted the same. On this day and every day, I am grateful not just for a caring husband but for a loving father who’s showing his little girl her true worth and how she deserves to be treated not just through his words but his actions too.
Here’s to all of the strong fathers and father figures, who offer physical, mental and emotional support and love, not just to their children but the mothers of their children too! May it be returned back to you ten fold.
“Are you ready, Quinn? There’s no turning back! Once it’s done, it’s done!” I informed my six year old. She smiled as eager as can be, “I’m ready!” For the past couple of years, my daughter occasionally asked about getting her ears pierced to which her father and I would respond, “Maybe when you’re a little older because this is a major decision. We want to make sure you’re absolutely sure.” We both decided before Quinn was born that we would not pierce her ears until she could verbally tell us that it’s what she wanted instead of making that decision for her.
Since she turned six on May 3rd, the main topic of conversation on a daily basis has been getting her ears pierced. She wanted to know when I got my ears pierced (I was a baby) and why most of her friends in school already have their ears pierced. “I watched a YouTube video where a little girl got hers done at Claire’s, and it only hurt for a split second,” she told me. Baffled, I asked, “How’d you find that video?” My kindergartener, who is a pretty sharp reader and writer, informed me that she typed in kids ear pierce, and the video came up. As a result of this, I knew she meant business. After discussing it with her dad, we decided that it was time and that she’d get it done as a special reward after her kindergarten graduation event.
We headed to Claire’s at Willow Grove Mall, and I probably had more butterflies in my stomach than Quinn. She skipped right up towards the store where I took her “before” pictures, and she was so excited to sit in the ear piercing chair holding their teddy bear, Petunia, who had her ears pierced. After looking at the many earring choices, she settled on 24 karat butterfly earrings: butterflies, what a coincidence!
To make the process easy, the Claire’s ear piercing specialist suggested having both ears done simultaneously to which we all agreed. First, I read over and signed the contract, which was probably the most difficult part with all of the warnings and precautions that must be taken into account to ensure that Quinn’s ears heal properly with no infections. Then the location for the piercings was designated and agreed upon. After that, the intense part of getting the actual ear piercings was performed. Quinn held Petunia and sat very still. Then with two simultaneous, loud clicks, and a quick bat of the eyes from Quinn, she was all done: no tears or scream of pain. “That didn’t hurt at all,” she said proudly.
It was such a magical moment over in a matter of seconds. Afterwards, she smiled so wide looking in the mirror and picked out a few more pairs of earrings to wear when she’s all healed. I told her, “Seeing you with earrings is going to take some getting used to for me. It means you’re really a big girl now!” Quinn just smiled and responded, “I am a big girl, Mommy!”
Though there’s so many more milestones to go, this one really “pierced” my heart letting me know there’s no turning back, and with each passing day my daughter is evolving into a big girl and will one day be a young lady and then a grown woman.
“Ooh, it’s sparkling all over, Mommy!” my six year old said while the sparkler illuminated as she held the end of its stem. This Memorial Day weekend, we had an intimate family cookout to not only remember the fallen soldiers but to celebrate my husband’s birthday too. As my daughter eagerly put on her red, white and blue romper and was ready to spend time with her family, I knew it was going to be a fun time.
As the day went on, I pulled out the sparklers I purchased. These are one of my favorite little fireworks from childhood. Though it may not cause much stimulation for adults, I knew the kids would enjoy them.
When I attempted to light the first sparkler, the wind picked up each time making it more difficult to get a spark. So we had to find a corner to shield the wind and find the right angle to light the sparkler. Even with trying to get the “right” angle, it took a little time. But once we developed a technique and realized that we couldn’t just hold the flame at the tip but had to slowly move it up in down from the tip a few centimeters, we finally go the sparkler ignited. After getting the first one, the others were much easier to do.
My daughter was so patient throughout this process. Yet at first, she was a little nervous about holding the sparkler. But once she did, she held the sparkler confidently and asked, “Can I do another one, please?!” Lighting the sparklers made me think about how much of a sparkler my little girl is. She truly illuminates my world. When her eyes light up about something that sparks interests within her, it fills me with hope and reignites some sparks in me that I thought fizzled years ago.
A sparkler may last just a minute or two, but the fun and experience from holding and waving them, for me, lasted well into adulthood. It is my hope that the passion and hope my daughter currently has will last a lifetime keeping her filled up and determined to leave her spark on the world.
“You know, Mommy, sorting and rolling socks together is actually kind of fun,” my newly six year old informed me yesterday as she helped with the laundry. Since my daughter was a toddler, she’s been helping around the house with basic tasks like putting away her toys, sweeping, clearing the plates from the table and even washing dishes. Most people would agree that chores can not only be a time consuming but be the tasks they dread doing the most. So it pleases me that my daughter has actually been begging for more chores to do around the house.
When she was a toddler, she’d help sort clothes by color or by item, such as tights, shirts or pants. But now she’s insisted on doing more, so she helps with folding undershirts, underwear and socks. “There’s a lot of socks here, Mommy!” Quinn started counting them and told me, “I folded together twenty-one pairs of socks, Mommy!” I love chores that stimulate critical thinking and allow my daughter to use math. Even afterwards, on her own, she decided to carry several of the socks in her shirt wrapped up at the bottom so that she could carry more at once. “Very clever technique, Quinnie!” I told her.
While I am sure there will come a time when Quinn may dread doing a certain chore, for now, I am grateful that she has fun doing them and understands the importance of contributing towards our household.
In 2013, just a week after giving birth to my little girl, I celebrated being a mother for the first time. Now, six years and hundreds of blog posts later, I have many baby steps behind me yet many more to go! Being a mother is such a rewarding experience, and my daughter has played a significant role in helping me to grow not just as a mother but as a person. I truly am lucky to have my own mother available to share advice and words of wisdom and to have a thoughtful and caring daughter who both make the challenging journey of motherhood an absolute joy.
Here’s to all of the mothers everywhere! May your baby steps into motherhood turn into bountiful leaps and jumps of joy filled with wonderful memories.
Six is a nice, even, perfect number and symbolizes beauty and ideals. Today, it’s also how many years my little girl has been on this Earth! Quinn is such a sweet, caring, thoughtful and confident person. Of course, one may think I’m saying this as her mother, but in her short six years of life, she truly has made a positive impact on so many lives of children as well as adults.
Interestingly, six also represents completeness, and I truly didn’t realize how much my life was missing until she became a part of it! I am so grateful and happy to celebrate her special day and want to make sure that she always knows how much I love her not just today but everyday.
“So Mommy, what was your students’ word of the day?” my little girl inquired. “Today’s word was languish,” I told her. She perked up and asked what it meant. After telling her, she then longingly said, ” I wish I could learn a word a day.” I then recalled seeing an advertisement for a book that gives children a word a day with pictures, definitions along with other features and thought it would be perfect! I showed the web site for Mrs. Wordsmith and samples to my soon to be six year old and asked her if she would like me to order it for her to which she eagerly replied, “Yes, please!”
I decided to order the word a day along with the story dictionary for children ages 6 – 12. (There’s one for 3 – 6 year olds too). Quinn checked the mailbox after school everyday. Finally, after almost two weeks, the materials had arrived! I was just as eager as my daughter was to tear open the package.
She asked, “Mommy, can we keep my word a day at the dining room table so that I can read the word and definition when I’m eating my breakfast and then practice again for lunch or dinner?” With a smile on my face, I nodded, “Of course!” “Since she’s in kindergarten and not quite six yet, I wasn’t sure if the materials would be too advanced since it is up to age 13, so I thought the dining room table would be the perfect location so that she may get assistance from her father or me with the words.
Thus far, I’m very impressed with how well Quinn is doing with sounding out and reading not just the words but the definitions and explanations too. The pictures are so colorful and nicely detailed to help not just children but adults who might not know some of the words. Something else that I love is that she is making an effort to create sentences using the words or making associations with the words.
There was, however, one word Quinn associated with me that caught me off guard. When I came home from work after not seeing Quinn in the morning during breakfast and asked her about the word of the day, she said, “Today’s word is describing you, Mommy. It’s conceited!” I tried to convince her that I wasn’t conceited, but then she showed me the illustration. “See, conceited is someone who likes to take a lot of selfies, just like you!” (Interestingly, when I was younger and even in early adulthood, I was always shy and self conscious about taking pictures.) I blushed and thought to myself, I guess I better cut back on all of the picture taking some.
If you are looking to help your child not only enhance his or her vocabulary but possibly yours as well, I strongly suggest purchasing the Storyteller’s Word a Day and Illustrated Dictionary. Quinn’s only been using it for a little over a week and loves getting her word a day!
Mommy's Baby Steps 